krisinluck
10-16-2008, 09:43 PM
I spent the morning at the funeral of my soon-to-be ex's 36 year old nephew who was killed in a motorcycle accident in the Cities (http://www.kare11.com/news/news_article.aspx?storyid=526782&catid=2) on Saturday. For those of you who have been around that long. his mom is the same woman whose four month old grandson was killed in a car accident back in the Auction Diner days. She looked like she was going to shatter into a billion pieces, and the whole situation just fucking sucks. He had finally managed to get a grip on his life - quit drinking, got his license back, moved to the cities and got a great job where he was named Employee of the Year in 2007...and in an instant - gone.
He wasn't wearing a helmet, of course. And he wasn't drinking. He just went to change lanes, went a little off the road to the shoulder, back on the road, wobbled, and down he went. Head injuries. Kinda like God just said "You. Now." and that was it.
My SIL kept saying "I can't do this. I can't handle this." Of course she can, because that is what we do and her other children still need her, but man. What a mess.
Then I had to go into work. Late, of course, but at least I got to go to this funeral. I've missed no less than four funerals of people I was close to in the last 18 months because there was "no one" to cover for me. My second girl for the evening had a meeting one town over at seven...she left me at 6:15, because, you know, it takes 45 minutes to go five fuckin' miles. I got my ass kicked while still completely drained from the whole funeral burial thing. Niiice. See if I go to bat for her come Sunday if she's busy and we're getting ready to leave her on her own.
But I was blessed enough to have ONE very bright spot in my day. I checked the mail. And in with all the bills and junk mail, there was an envelope with no return address, my address handwritten, and postmarked Eau Claire. I opened it up, and there was a brochure for the really really really nice Aveda salon/day spa in town here. Tucked inside of that was a gift certificate for way more money than I would ever dream of spending there in a shot, from "Anonymous".
Now, I'm kinda seeing a guy up here (ok, I am seeing a guy - it's not serious, but it's fun! I had forgotten it could be fun!) and he stopped at the restaurant this afternoon. I told him about it and his eyebrows went up. "You have a secret admirer out there?" I asked him flat out if he sent it. He swears he didn't, and besides, it was more than I think he'd give for something like that. These men up here are way too practical for that. Grocery store or Walmart certificate? Yeah. But something that would force me to take time for myself while working two jobs and doing private work on the side so I can quit one of those jobs and actually spend some time with this kid I'm doing this for? Oh, hell no.
When I finally got home from work (after retrieving the Daughter from her friend's house, when she was supposed to be home...but that's just more of the shitty day stuff) I got online to unwind and there was a PM in my box here. From someone I've "known" online for years, but not really close or anything. This person had asked for my address in PM sometime last week, and I sent it to them with some smart-assed comment about a battery operated boyfriend and LOL. I have precious little memory retention these days, working as much as I am. I had forgotten all about that exchange.
That is who sent me this gift certificate.
I am not naming them, but by God, I'm sure sharing it.
We see and read and perceive so many things on these boards that are nasty and horrible, this group hates every member of that group, grudges are held for years and years and years. It's like that's all we get on these boards.
But to this person - who I really don't know well at all - who could see that I'm burning the candle at both ends trying to make this new life work, I want to say thank you from the bottom of my formerly cold and bitter boardie heart. The timing could not have been better, and I am so so glad you sent me the note to remind me of our earlier conversation.
I am grateful to you for putting some good not only in my shitty day, and for providing a way to get my hair trimmed tomorrow without foregoing gas in the car...but mostly for reminding me that these boards are not just for verbally drawing blood. They are a community, whether anyone wants to admit it or not. That community is what we choose to make it.
I will not ever forget this. Thank you so much. When I am able, I give you my word I will pay this one forward.
He wasn't wearing a helmet, of course. And he wasn't drinking. He just went to change lanes, went a little off the road to the shoulder, back on the road, wobbled, and down he went. Head injuries. Kinda like God just said "You. Now." and that was it.
My SIL kept saying "I can't do this. I can't handle this." Of course she can, because that is what we do and her other children still need her, but man. What a mess.
Then I had to go into work. Late, of course, but at least I got to go to this funeral. I've missed no less than four funerals of people I was close to in the last 18 months because there was "no one" to cover for me. My second girl for the evening had a meeting one town over at seven...she left me at 6:15, because, you know, it takes 45 minutes to go five fuckin' miles. I got my ass kicked while still completely drained from the whole funeral burial thing. Niiice. See if I go to bat for her come Sunday if she's busy and we're getting ready to leave her on her own.
But I was blessed enough to have ONE very bright spot in my day. I checked the mail. And in with all the bills and junk mail, there was an envelope with no return address, my address handwritten, and postmarked Eau Claire. I opened it up, and there was a brochure for the really really really nice Aveda salon/day spa in town here. Tucked inside of that was a gift certificate for way more money than I would ever dream of spending there in a shot, from "Anonymous".
Now, I'm kinda seeing a guy up here (ok, I am seeing a guy - it's not serious, but it's fun! I had forgotten it could be fun!) and he stopped at the restaurant this afternoon. I told him about it and his eyebrows went up. "You have a secret admirer out there?" I asked him flat out if he sent it. He swears he didn't, and besides, it was more than I think he'd give for something like that. These men up here are way too practical for that. Grocery store or Walmart certificate? Yeah. But something that would force me to take time for myself while working two jobs and doing private work on the side so I can quit one of those jobs and actually spend some time with this kid I'm doing this for? Oh, hell no.
When I finally got home from work (after retrieving the Daughter from her friend's house, when she was supposed to be home...but that's just more of the shitty day stuff) I got online to unwind and there was a PM in my box here. From someone I've "known" online for years, but not really close or anything. This person had asked for my address in PM sometime last week, and I sent it to them with some smart-assed comment about a battery operated boyfriend and LOL. I have precious little memory retention these days, working as much as I am. I had forgotten all about that exchange.
That is who sent me this gift certificate.
I am not naming them, but by God, I'm sure sharing it.
We see and read and perceive so many things on these boards that are nasty and horrible, this group hates every member of that group, grudges are held for years and years and years. It's like that's all we get on these boards.
But to this person - who I really don't know well at all - who could see that I'm burning the candle at both ends trying to make this new life work, I want to say thank you from the bottom of my formerly cold and bitter boardie heart. The timing could not have been better, and I am so so glad you sent me the note to remind me of our earlier conversation.
I am grateful to you for putting some good not only in my shitty day, and for providing a way to get my hair trimmed tomorrow without foregoing gas in the car...but mostly for reminding me that these boards are not just for verbally drawing blood. They are a community, whether anyone wants to admit it or not. That community is what we choose to make it.
I will not ever forget this. Thank you so much. When I am able, I give you my word I will pay this one forward.