The fucked up advice thread.

[10x]

For amusment only. Please do not try any advice given.


Need some Fucked up vulger advice? Post you problem here.

Some one will atemp to humor you with fucked up vulger advice. remeber please do not follow advice given here.

[agentorange]

I'm looking for some fucked up advice on how to off my mother in law. She continues to visit my home (I paid for it, NOT my stay at home lazy wife who watches soaps all day) and when she does visit, all she does is criticize my parenting abilities and my ability as a lover to my wife. I often have fantasies about sticking her head in a scolding hot bath and pretend she drowned, it was a "horrible accident". My wife seems to think that her mother has earned a right to invade my home and tell my own kids that "daddy is a drunk, let grammy hug you". I don't find this acceptable. Do you have any advice on how to bury her in a forrest, or perhaps shove a cheddar cheese wedge down her gullet and have her choke to death? I'm thinking Momma Cass here. Maybe I can beat her to death with a limp salami? Any fucked up advice would be appreciated. I also contemplated cutting the break lines on my SUV and barreling down the road at full speed, "beyond my control". SMACK! Oops. You think this is viable? I cannot accept this woman into my home anymore, she must be properly disposed of. Also, I think she suffers from dementia, so the luring of her into these situtions would be pretty easy. She hasn't the common sense to realize how much I want her gone.

*I am unmarried, have no children, and have no mother in law, any and all depictions of death and/or torture are merely fiction. Any names are coincidental. I reserve the right under the first abandoned amendment of the United States of Supression to post these things without fear of prosecution from the retarded DA who inhabits most communities in Amerikkka. Should you be one of my 6 stalkers/harassers, known and proven psychopaths, feel free to persue it*

[10x]

Ahh mother in laws. First they usualy are just pissed of cus they are not getting enough.

Sound like you want rid of em. One method is the exlax food suply. I think you can get the idea. If she eats at your place well she will shit her guts out.
That ass hole will become so soore that she will never want to come back. Some thimes this works, some times not. Some just come over to get rid of their shit. Depends on how fucked in the head they are.

So lets see, how to get rid of the cunt. Hmm.

Well in my state this would be easy. Go to Elephant Butte lake in a trailer or camper. Be shure to bring you mother in law with you LOL
Conect up to the facilitys there, MAKE sure you do not pay.
Get the famaliy and you away and leave her there at the traler.

Wont be long for a park ranger to come along and get in an argument with her. Belive me they will shot her in the back.
The fucking sex starved cunt will be gone at no fault in the eyes of the rest of the group.

End of game. Problem solved. Oh and make shure to pay the ranger the fees for parking after they shot her. You dont want shot yourself.


Works for other famaily members you would like to get rid of also.

Good luck , and remeber do not ever get caught.



Disclamer. This post and thread is for fun only, Advice here is given for amusment only.

[Heartland]

Geez Roy. What's eating you? :1madrealm

[Powerhouse]

I wasn't amused. Guess I'm not in the target audience.

[10x]

Dont woory I will find and thingk up more fucked up advice for em. LOL

[agentorange]

I have 3 day old noodle salad in the trunk of my car that's about to turn... any fucked up advice?

[10x]

"have 3 day old noodle salad in the trunk of my car that's about to turn... any fucked up advice?"

Damn you got to use them noodles the first day to beat folks with.

So now you got them noodles all ready for a shove and eat fest. Got an partners willing to sove em inside and then let you eat??

Other wise you will have to figure out how to do it with yourself.

[10x]

Proof of my former mother in law advice.

http://www.lcsun-news.com/cgi-bin/artman/exec/view.cgi/197/18737/printer

Now back to that mater.

THe mother in law.

If you aint woth a million, and giving it all to the women in your extended folk group you are going to be not good enough. Simple fact is there is no way out of this veiwpoint, so just get rid of em when they become to much of a pain.

In this case the three day old salad might just do the trick.

Note DO NOT FOLLOW ANY ADVICE GIVEN. Amusment only.

[10x]

And advice to those who do not like my fucked up vulger advice:

Burn your eyes out so you caint fucking read it. Poke your ears out so no one can tell it to you. Muhhahahahhahahahahaahahhahahaha.


:1evil3:


Amusment only do not follow any advice.

[agentorange]

A state parks officer fatally shot a man Tuesday night at Elephant Butte State Park during a confrontation over the man’s refusal to pay camping fees.

Amusment only do not follow any advice.
Glad I caught that in time, I was just about to head to the campground!

[Heartland]

Base has a folk group?

This sure isn't Dear Abby!

[Powerhouse]

More like Dear Crabby. :1jester:

[lil*hummer]

Did the article mention that the family says he was shot in the back?

I got tired of reading that news already.

[agentorange]

Did the article mention that the family says he was shot in the back?
He was trying to run away without paying his campground fees! The officer was only doing his job, he couldn't let this hardened campground criminal screw the state park comission out of $8. I am so glad we have such dedicated law enforcement agents to protect us from these no-good campground abusers.

[blissmeister]

Just one bullet? Whats his number?

[agentorange]

I do not know. Check your AW PMs :2headspin

[10x]

Three shots, two hits. The guy caried a digital recorder, usualy on.

No real reason for the shooting.

LOL Make sure to pay your fees. Or make sure you leave whomever there to take the bullets if you dont pay.

[agentorange]

Roy, when you say "no real reason for the shooting" are you FORGETTING that he failed to pay his 8 dollar campground fee? I suppose that doesn't matter in your world, just skip out on your park ranger... NO, NO, NO~! It will get you shot, man!

[agentorange]

"shoot Zeee Camphhhground Scumz~! Heil Hitlah!"

[lotsafuzz]

Hey 10X! I live in Las Cruces (from the link you posted)! Weird!

[10x]

Welcome to the ross show, and good to see anoughter New Mexican here.

[lotsafuzz]

So, where are you located?

[10x]

TorC The twisted zone or more nown as torque zone.

[tekobari]

10x, I never figured you for a New Mexican. I always pictured you from Chicago or some big city. How strange.

[10x]

Acually a transplaned Texan,

Buy the way I can say Texas sucks I was born there to give me that right. LOL

[rossshow]

Thentavius, too. He lives in NM, too.

[10x]

DID not know that Ross. Thanks for the info.

[Kandi]

10X, isn't New Mexico where that church is that has the unexplained staircase that has gained notoriety as far as the engineering of the staircase and the possibility of who built it? If so, do you know it's location or any other info on it? Thanks.

[Cyber Diva]

Acually a transplanted Texan,

By the way I can say Texas sucks I was born there so give me that right. LOL

No! You have no rights!
:2slampan:

[biondobabe]

Hey 10X! I live in Las Cruces (from the link you posted)! Weird!

I love Las Cruses. Red sauce or Green sauce? Best food I ever had was there.

[10x]

unexplained staircase
Yes it is in New Mexico, will look it up for you. Ita a spiral with no nails in it.

[10x]

LOL I had posted the info in wrong thread.

Oh well repete/
http://www.funtripslive.com/santa_f...e/staircase.htm
This tells the story of it.
More
http://www.theoutlaws.com/unexplained4.htm

http://search.yahoo.com/search?p=ne...fficial&fr=moz2

[agentorange]

I love Las Cruses. Red sauce or Green sauce? Best food I ever had was there.
The only thing in Las Cruces is Holoman AFB, Walmart, and some fast food Mexican restaurant. Where are you eating there? Up north a ways is Ruidoso, a small Indian community which has a ski resort and a casino.

[Eriu]

Did I just see the one and only Lotsafuzz???????


Hey there!

[biondobabe]

The only thing in Las Cruces is Holoman AFB, Walmart, and some fast food Mexican restaurant. Where are you eating there? Up north a ways is Ruidoso, a small Indian community which has a ski resort and a casino.

We found this little family restaurant. Not the most attractive and inviting place from the outside but something called me in.

When returning back to the east coast we planned to stay a day in Las Cruses. I so wanted to visit that restaurant again. I allowed my husband and our bellboy to talk me into trying another mexican place. Guaranteeing me the food was better.

I was mad as hell over that meal. It sucked. And we couldn't stick around late enough to go to the other place the next day. My marriage tanked because of that single incident. True story. Now the SOB lives 3 hours from there, I'm 4 days away.

[agentorange]

Yeah, it was a family owned restaurant I ate at there, too. The only restaurant I remember seeing off base. It was sorta a dive, and inside it looked like a run down cafe, and they served burgers and mexican food, if I remember correctly. I think they had good food, but there were lots of derilect teens hanging out there that kinda ruined the atmosphere.

[lotsafuzz]

Uh, Holoman is in Alamogordo, NM about an hour away from Las Cruces. We are a university town with White Sands Mis. Range about 15 minutes out of town.

Oh, and green....always green!

[lotsafuzz]

Did I just see the one and only Lotsafuzz???????


Hey there!


Yep! 'Tis me! (and I've been double secret certified to be really me ;))

:)

[agentorange]

You're right, I got the two confused. Yes, it's Alomogordo that is the shit dive. I drove through both on that long 8 hour desert sleepathon, and was so exhausted I didn't know where I was.

[10x]

"and was so exhausted I didn't know where I was."


Now Now dont drink and drive.

[Heartland]

I got lost in Colorado once. At least I think it was Colorado. I also got lost in Arizona, and while lost, discovered Sedona!

[biondobabe]

I got lost in Colorado once. At least I think it was Colorado. I also got lost in Arizona, and while lost, discovered Sedona!


Discovering Sedona wasn't a bad thing. Absolutely breathtaking.